Erotic spanking is one of the most natural ways to enter the world of BDSM. It’s a great way to bring a new sensation into an intimate experience, to introduce a bit of playful pain and heighten the experience of pleasure. And it’s easy. All you need is a hand and a buttock and you’re in business.
The ass is a delightful erogenous zone and a bit of playful spanking can leave your lover dripping with excitement. Spanking stimulates the nerve endings and increases the blood flow, sending waves of endorphins through the body. With a few light taps, you can vary the sensations of your sensual play and make every touch more exquisite. Here are all the tips you need to begin your sensual journey into impact play.
A Word on Safety
Before any impact play, it’s important to address safety issues. The first thing to remember is that all healthy sensual play is consensual. Talk about your limits beforehand and arrange safe words that you can use when things stray beyond your boundaries. The beautiful thing about this pre-play discussion is that it heightens the anticipation and can make anything that follows even more delicious. At, at the very least, it ensures that you have good communication so your needs and boundaries are honoured.
Pay special attention to where you’re spanking. The sweet spots are the meaty areas of the buttocks and upper thighs. Avoid the tailbone or higher up the back near the kidneys, as these areas might be injured with impact. You might want to practice your aim on a pillow or sofa to make sure your swats land where you want them to in the heat of the moment. And, if you’re using implements like canes or paddles, try them out on yourself first so you know the intensity firsthand.
One delightful tip is to consider the frequency of your strikes. Too many blows in one place or too quickly can be painful – and not in the good way. Try to keep at least three seconds between strikes and vary where they land. You want to keep things exciting rather than stray into the territory of discomfort.
If your play has left a few bruises, don’t be surprised. It happens from time to time. Just treat the area with ice for 20-30 minutes after the play is done. If you play with multiple partners, make sure to sanitise your implements thoroughly after play. Also, don’t overdo it. You don’t want to desensitise the butt or cause the skin to toughen.
With any sensual play it’s important to ease into things. You might be hot and ready just thinking about your sensual play, but you don’t want to jump out of the gate at 60 miles per hour. Give your lover some time to let the excitement rise. The body needs to be prepared for anything more intense, so start slow and let things build.
A spanking can feel delicious on many parts of the body, but one of the best is the ass. When spanking the ass, you open up the blood vessels and excite the nerve endings of the genitals. This can heighten the pleasure of any sensation that follows. Some other areas include the hands, feet, shoulder blades, and the breasts or pecs. If you do choose to bring your spanking into these regions, remember to keep it light and use a flogger.
The key to getting started is to massage the area to get the blood flowing. Rub the area with a circular motion and squeeze lightly. You’ll want your touch nice and warm, so rub the hands together lightly before you begin. After you lightly rub and tickle the skin to get the sensation going, spank four times, giving a bit of genital stimulation between each blow. Cup the hand slightly and spank with an upward motion, lifting and exciting the flesh with each strike. Once you’ve excited the area and warmed it up, you can add a fifth, more forceful slap.
Now that your lover is good and excited, it’s time to step it up a notch.
Assume the Position!
Each position offers its own flavour to the sensual experience. First, make sure you’re both comfortable. The more relaxed you are, the more pleasurable the sensations will be. The most traditional positions are over the knee and lying down. Lying down is one of the best positions for beginners, as it will allow you to remain relaxed throughout your play. To provide a bit of cushion and give you both a lift, slide a pillow under the hips. Over the knee is great to offer a bit of easy restraint. It’s an ideal position for short range implements and a bit of kinky role play.
If you’re spanking an area other than the buttocks, a restrained or standing position may be preferable. Restraints can be exciting all in themselves, and they can help to keep the bottom firmly in place as it receives your attention. Standing is good for those that want to keep the play light, as it is less painful than bent over or lying down. You’ll want to play carefully, as movement could affect the accuracy of the blows. For those that would like to get really excited, spanking while doggy-style stretches the muscles and nerve endings, making the sensations much more intense.
The Tools of the Trade
There are a number of different tools that can be brought into your impact play, and each offers their own unique sensation. Each implement varies in strength and intensity, so you have a wide range of choice to tailor your sensation to your desires.
The first and most obvious implement is the hand. This is best for beginners, as it is less painful than other implements and you will be better able to feel the intensity of the strikes, moderating it to your lover’s pleasure. The hand produces a thudding sensation and is unlikely to leave lasting welts or bruises.
Moving up, we have the flogger, a whip-like handle with a number of thick/thin tails. There are many variations to the flogger, and each leaves their own distinct marks. Fluffy floggers are light and soft, while the leather variety offers a bit more intensity. Explore to see which one you like best. Next, there’s the riding crop. This is a long, flexible rod with a bit of leather on the end for striking. Even the slightest motion can offer quite a sting and will leave an impressive bruise, so be careful.
The next tool on the list is the paddle. This is less sever that the long range implements, but can still leave quite a mark. The feeling of the paddle is similar to a hand, but a bit more intense. Moving up in intensity, we have the cane. Canes give a sharp, stinging sensation and is likely to leave marks and thin bruises. It’s easy to control, but be carful not to overdo it.
Tawses and straps are the tools that deliver the most force. They are heavy strips of leather with handles. The main difference between them is the the tawse is split into a couple of tails. The length and amount of these tails can vary from one tawse to the next. These offer an intense and thudding pain that reddens the skin and is certain to leave an impression.
Whips are beautiful punishment devices and a delightful addition to any dom’s collection. They give a quick, sharp sting and leave long thin welts. The use of a whip can be quite an art, so make sure you practice before bringing it into your sensual play. Remember to vary the frequency and placement of your strikes, and it can be exciting to alternate each blow with pleasurable sensations.
After a bit of punishment, the sub can feel tender in a few ways. Physically, it helps to use the spanked area, soothing it and letting the sensations fade. On a deeper level, the sub can slip into “sub space” during punishment play. This is an altered state of consciousness that heightens sensation and leaves the sub in a dreamy, unfocused place. The chemical rush can be so intense that it will leave some subs a blubbering wreck. Make sure to ease their re-entry into reality with beautiful, loving attention. Give them time to come back slowly, and they will love the experience from beginning to end.
It can be amazing to bring impact play into the bedroom, but take it slow. Ease into the exploration, making sure that both parties love every moment of our journey. Have fun and find out how exciting it can be!